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“I blog because assault is illegal.”

Tag Archives: Parenthood

12/05/2010 Holiday Poop-i-ness

It just so happens that I find myself sulking around the house due to the pending arrival of Santa & Christmas. I just can’t get into the Christmas spirit. My parents are five hours away, my brother recently moved three hours away, my old brother is hours away and well … I just wish I could spend the holiday with them. Add to that my car recently fainted while my husband was driving – I can’t determine if it’s his driving that made the poor little car faint or if it’s just due to the age/mileage. =0) Eitherway – I’m trying to remain spirited through the holiday season … but in truth, it just gives me a head ache.

The kids will write their Santa letters today. My oldest asked for the Hulk game for his PS-2 .. I found on ebay for less than $10.00. My daughter wanted anything and everything Littlest Pet Shop – well I found a lot of that on Ebay too. I fulfilled their wishes. My middle son wants a remote control helicopter. I’ve yet to find one of those but I will. =0) I love making my kids smile. On too the meme portion …

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11/19/2010 Good Morning- You have a Guardian Angel!

I woke up this fine morning to my nine year old laying next to me describing a ball of light that looked like this –> (      ), black shadows going over there —>, and a noise. It is always the noise that bothers me. We do not know where it is coming from, but my nine year old swears it was from over there —>.

Lets face it, a majority of the world believes in the possibility of after life, the paranormal, spooky-pants and I happen to fall in to that category. As my nine year old describes what clearly sounds the perfect paranormal experience – I had about five-thousand explanations going through my head. Do I tell him it might be a ghost? No, probably not. He wont ever sleep again and fail all of his classes. Not to mention it’s possible he may just want to rent his own house and be done with this one.

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11/17/2010 4th of July Cake for a Dog’s Birthday

I might add that I quiet often crack myself up – my interpretations of my life events are quiet often humorous even is it involves tough times. Today we went to Wally World (have I ever mentioned how much I love Walmart) .. amongst our things to do included getting in there and getting out without Cadey having a princess episode. All was well until we hit half way home. She decided that our trip was fruitless if she didn’t get a snack. Me being a professional negotiator suggested making a cake when we got home. My goal was to distract her and avoid excessive amounts of crying. Cadey thought this was a brilliant idea and decided it would be her birthday cake because as she informed her father who was driving … “Today is my birthday, Daddy.” I thought, that’s odd, I recall giving birth to you on July 1st not November 17th. Her father chimed in with all his daddy charm and suggested that it be Bear’s birthday today. All of sudden the entire scenrio shifted – Cadey announced that it was in fact, Bear’s birthday today and she was going to make him a cake. Wait, not JUST a cake but a cupcake, a giant one with sprinkles. We can’t forget the sprinkles.

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11/17/2010 Give me something to write about!

Creative Writing is fun – blogging is much more fun – writing for college …. blah .. B.O.R.I.N.G What’s the deal – I don’t understand why I have so much fun blogging, writing articles online, pissing & moaning here, inspiring over at Kreative Journal, flapping off about my photos at Visual Findings, and yes .. even assuring my facebook status is always up to date with my mood swings. I went on the hunt this morning for blogging memes partially because they always amuse me .. I found this one >> Creative Writing. I missed last week so here is my 5 Good Things About Myself …

  1. My hair is pretty fabulous. It is dire need of a dye job (again) but I love the way my hair stylist cut it. Yup, fabbb-o.
  2. My eyes … they’re a misty gray color. I’ve been told they resemble a marble pattern (? W.t.F ?).
  3. My bum is pretty nice. My husband seems to agree. After three kids, I think my bum is bigger, but .. umm.. there?
  4. My lips – my daughter has my lips and they have a pretty shape. I have pretty lips. *puckers up*
  5. My heart – it hasn’t failed me yet. Still beating …

What?!? She didn’t specify inside or outside, right? I have a damn good heart. Pffft. (:

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11/16/2010 Tuesday Nonsense – No B.S. Here

Tuesday Nonsense …

Five Things I Want My Kids to Know Before They Grow Up …

  1. There will be a moment in your life where you will be able to make your own choices. If you  want to wear a hot pink sweater with white-spotted leotards and Uggs boots when it is 95 degrees outside – feel free, when you’re 18. Until than, your choices (at an extended level) are MY choices; as I brought you into this world without medication because I didn’t want to harm you. That sacrifice caused me an unimaginable amount of pain for several hours, that will still take a few years of therapy to get over. MY choice… k?
  2. Life is not fair. Regardless of what anyone shall ever tell you, things do not just magically fall into place on their own. You will have to put a little elbow grease into it to get exactly what you want. The opportunities are limitless however, even when you have obtained a million dollars – life will still throw you a handful of fresh-shit. Be prepared by being smart, open-minded, tolerant, and willing to be a leader when the need arises. Oh and pick up your toys.
  3. I already know the dog didn’t do it however, because you are three years old and go to such great lengths to amuse me with your wild tales – I concur and move on while laughing on the inside. Do I sincerely believe the dog smeared an entire jar of peanut butter on the wall? Probably not because he listens when I say, “Paws Off!”. I love you anyways.
  4. Wilbor is not really Wilbor. Walmart does not have a hospital for fish. Wilbor is an ancestor of the three times deceased Wilbor. While lying is something I so lovingly remind you not to do, I lied because I know how much that strange, slippery, staring purple fish means to you.
  5. I am not a magician. While you are convinced I can make money, toys, food, and all your desires appear out of thin air, it just so happens I failed that class and took Psychology instead.

With all that said, did I mention my good intentions were an epic fail? As I began to twitch this morning from the usual morning chaos – a dear friend brought me a pack of smokes so I wouldn’t end up in prison. I suppose he thought a pack of smokes was cheaper than bail. ;0)

 

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